Ironic

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Baldrick: I have a cunning plan to save the king.
Edmund Blackadder: Ha! Well forgive me if I don’t do a cartwheel of joy; your family’s history in the department of cunning planning is about as impressive as Stumpy O’Leg McNolegs’ personal best in the Market Harborough marathon.

Since John Howard began stacking the Board of what he was determined would become His ABC, there is absolutely no doubt that the political philosophy of, and reporting by, that once great neutral public broadcaster has, like its role model the BBC, swung sharply to the very right of the conservative end of the Australian political spectrum and beyond into the wastelands of right wing think tankism, libertarianism and tea partyism.

No doubt about the techniques used to achieve this, nor about the result, but, just as in the choice between conspiracy and stuff up to explain a disaster, some doubt about the logic behind it. Well, doubt in my mind anyway, as an avid consumer of ABC news and current affairs for 60 years who has refused to watch any in the last 5 years or so. A doubt brought into even sharper focus by the recent Federal Budget brought down by the “Enemies of the ABC” government which has slashed huge sums from the ABC budget and is now to force them to outsource all production. The end, as demanded by the Liberal Party scriptwriter, the IPA, is nigh for Australia’s public broadcaster.

The doubt? Well we can look at it two ways. The change to the ABC could be the result of fundamentalist political beliefs, or a cunning plan gone wrong in catastrophic Baldrickian fashion. The first theory would point out that, as Keating might say, if you change the Board and senior management of an organisation you change the organisation in a trickle-down effect. Boards appoint politically simpatico senior managers, who in turn appoint like-minded middle managers, who in turn appoint right-minded producers, editors, reporters, presenters. By the time the last appointment is made you have a public broadcaster made in the form of the mind of John Howard.

The second, Baldrickian theory is this. Faced, once the Rudd-Gillard political totentanz began, with the inevitability, apparently sooner rather than later, of an Abbott Murdoch-puppet-government working through an IPA wish list featuring prominently the privatisation of the ABC, and the dismantling (or sale to Murdoch) of the Australia Network, senior management seized on a survival plan. All News bulletins would lead with “The Opposition (ie the Liberals) said today….” restricting any government rebuttals. No government policies or plans would be treated positively. News items would be extensively derived from News Ltd papers, or radio shock jocks, each day. Commentary would be obtained almost entirely from News Ltd reporters and columnists, reliably right wing academics, former Howard ministers, former Labor ministers known for their now far-Right views, IPA staff current and former, vox pops chosen to be critical of government. The same unholy chorus of right wing ideologues would appear on every current affairs show, vastly outnumbering the occasional presence of David Marr or a Labor minister.

Presenters and political reporters would be either known for their anti-Labor proclivities, or be under instruction that all reporting/interviewing was to be on the basis of Liberal Good, Labor Bad. That no scurrilous rumour undermining the government should be left unreported, no examination of Liberal policies was to occur. That satirical programs ridiculing Gillard and Rudd were to be encouraged, but that Abbott was to be given a Menzies aura. The ABC credibility as a serious independent neutral public broadcaster was used to give credibility to News Ltd, the IPA, and the Liberal Party. The prospect of the imminent arrival of an Abbott government was turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy by the ABC on September 7, 2013.

But if the ABC had been turned into a Libertarian wet dream by a trickle of neoconservative ideology, or if this was the cunning plan for the survival of the ABC as a public broadcaster, what went wrong in May 2014? Months of attacks on the “left wing bias” of the ABC by ministers and News Ltd continued in the lead-up to the Budget in which the worst fears of the few remaining Friends of the ABC were realised.

Well, there was just one tiny flaw in the cunning plan (if cunning plan it was), hardly worth mentioning really. But it relied on members of the government sharing a belief with the rest of the country that the ABC was a very important national institution, a fundamental part of Australia, and that pouring right wing ideology into it would be enough to encourage the Liberal Party to keep it intact. That if they heard a chorus of right wing voices singing from the Menzies House song book on ABC every day they would see it as useful in their plans for a thousand-year rule.

Trouble is they didn’t and don’t. With Murdoch and the shock jocks on side they saw no need for an ABC, that given, as it were, a choice between a real News Limited and a Public Broadcaster who acts like a Murdoch mouth piece, a Liberal will vote for his real Masters Voice every time.

So, whether a plan or not, moving to the Right won the ABC no reprieve from the Liberal government, while at the same time it lost it all the support of those of the Centre and Left who were once friends of the Corporation and would once have massively demonstrated in its support.

Blackadder: Baldrick, have you no idea what “irony” is?
Baldrick: Yes, it’s like “goldy” and “bronzy” only it’s made out of iron.

Selective media

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Petri dishes are often used to make agar plates, made up of nutrient materials, for microbiology studies. Agar plates may be formulated as either permissive (or undefined), with the intent of allowing the growth of whatever organisms are present; or restrictive or selective (or defined), with the intent of only allowing growth a particular subset of those organisms. Defined media can be precisely tailored to select organisms with specific properties.

Recently been having some work done in garden. A Bobcat with a wicked looking “Ripper” attachment (“Rip through tough, hard-packed, and frozen material with the powerful force of the ripper attachment. The single-point tooth design delivers optimum penetration through tough soil, frozen ground, and root systems with rugged force.”) has been turning over the ground, while soon a shitload of manure will arrive and be spread over and into the now loosened soil. Then the landscape will be ready for, receptive to, the planting of new trees which would have had no chance of surviving in the original growth medium of the garden. And the new medium will be permissive, ready for a diversity of trees and shrubs and flowers.
image
Looks like Tony Abbott has issued his merry men (and Julie) “Ripper” attachments for their political bobcats. Rippers designed to rip through tough social fabric, the roots of political networks, and frozen progressive beliefs with rugged force, their single-minded obsession providing optimum penetration. Rip – science destroyed; rip – chaplains in public schools; rip – Medicare co-payments; rip – bring back British honours; rip – high university fees; rip – 6 months with no support for unemployed youth; rip – increase GST; rip – create a right wing curriculum; rip – no minimum wage; rip – decimate tax office; rip – ban all protest; rip – smash public service; rip – remove oversight and regulation of white collar crime; rip – promote monarchy; rip – destroy all parliamentary conventions; rip – remove laws against discrimination and racism; rip – destroy public broadcasting. And so on – feel free to add others.

They have been working away (with the help of the media) since 7 September, turning over Australian society, creating a medium in which to plant their ideology. Adding a shitload of horse manure from the American Tea Party. Producing a selective medium precisely tailored for one ideology – defined as the Randian Hayekian Friedmanite neoconservative laissez-faire unregulated nineteenth century dog-eat-dog world of 21st century America. Ideology which could not have flourished in the old unripped Australia. No other ideology, philosophy, ideas, views, will be able to grow in this restrictive medium. No power source except corporate power will be permitted to flourish.

Welcome to Australia’s neoliberal garden.

RIP Australia.

Old currency

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What else can possibly be said about the worst Australian Budget in history that wasn’t said by Abbott’s smirk as Hockey screwed the students; his comment that they were going to undo everything the Australian Labor Party had ever done in government; and Hockey’s comment that they were going to get government out of people’s lives (given that the government is, or should be, the people, this translates as “getting people out of their own lives”)? Well, possibly this:
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Some of the people

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The Tea Partyish “Liberal” Party of Australia politicians and spin doctors have realised that the voters are now irrelevant in a western democracy. You only have to satisfy some of the people all of time:
1. Media owners, especially R Murdoch.
2. Mining magnates, especially Gina, Twiggy and Clive
3. Right wing think tanks IPA and CIS.
4. American multinational corporation CEOs
5. Media shock jocks
6. Heads of IMF and World Bank

Perhaps a sum total of 50 people, 100 tops?

The other 23 million people in Australia are now irrelevant all of the time.

The Labor Party seems to have reached the same conclusion.

As have political parties in America, UK, France, Germany…
Discuss.

New Blighty

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These kind of wtf moments seem to come every day from this worst-government-in-Australian-History government. “I drive to Canberra to go to Parliament … and I must say I find those wind turbines around Lake George to be utterly offensive,” Mr Hockey said. “I think they’re a blight on the landscape.”
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Roaring mouse

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Every so often an idea comes to one with a blinding flash of the kind that makes you want to say to Saul Tarsus “call that a blinding flash, THIS is a blinding flash”. And so it was today.

You see today our glorious leader announced that Australia is to buy JSF, purchase some 5000 of the new F35 fighter jets. Maybe it was 500. Or 58 rising to 100. Whatever, $12 billion worth for the first lot.
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Play up play up

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The last football match I went to, forty years ago, was Coventry Reserves playing Preston North End Reserves (starring an ancient Nobby Styles) in 1974. I say this to demonstrate my lack of interest in football as a spectator sport rather than for any historic interest (other than the aforesaid young Nobby) in that game itself.

Oh, I have watched on tv the odd cup and grand final since then, read an occasional analytical piece on, say, “the future of rugby league” – I always aim to be able to hold my end up for two minutes in a discussion on any subject, part of being civilised. But no more than 2 minutes on sport.
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Eating people is wrong

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I first entered the hallowed halls of a university a long long time ago. So long that my lecturers were monks in full monkish gear, there were theologians, we ate in a Refectory, wore gowns and mortar boards for graduation, and lived in “colleges” (well, some of us did, the wealthier ones); there were cloisters (sort of!) somewhere, and a tower where bells were rung for the call to prayers (no, made up the bells).
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Substitute

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All those photos of psychopathic morons proudly showing the bleeding bodies of lions, giraffes, bears, wolves, elephants they have blasted with high-powered penis substitutes? Guess they think we will be envious of their prowess.

Makes good people not envious but sick to their stomachs seeing these vicious fools posed with their killing machines with foot triumphantly on top of the body of their victims. Makes them determined perhaps to try to stop this evil.
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Monkey magic

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We all know the nature of monkey is irrepressible, right?

And the nature of the lion is to hunt, of the vulture to pick up the leftovers, of the hyena to scavenge the scraps.

Regular readers know that I don’t have “a deep burning hatred” for the neo-conservative scum (oops, sorry) now infesting the Australian corridors of power. No, not at all. Liberal and National Party politicians, and the right-wing think tank vermin (again, “oopsy”) that advise them, simply can’t help being what they are. When they demand the scrapping of the minimum wage, want additional payments to see the doctor, talk nonsense about natural CO2 and demand scrapping of a price on carbon, refuse legal advice to refugees, rewrite school curricula, dump spoil on Barrier Reef, remove limits on hate speech, sell public assets, remove financial and environmental regulations, invade other countries, clear-fell heritage forests, and so on, this just reflects their nature.
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